Archive of Filked Requests
Re-Live the Memories, Get the Earworms
Tune: House Of The Rising Sun by The Animals
Y’all have sites upon the web
For fine folks of Æthelmearc
It’s time for Spiders to report
On how your sites do spark
Please notice that the date has moved
It’s due by 15 May
However you all need not wait
You can submit today!
We thank you from the Webmins’try
To update all your sites
It’s important for our membership
To get info that’s right
————–
January 2024
——
September 2023
July 2023
Tune: The Rainbow Connection
March 2023
December 2022
Tune: Sounds of Silence
(With apologies to Simon & Garfunkel)
Hello Spiders, my old friends
I’m writing filk for you again
Because it’s time to submit reports
Please dear webmins – I ask for your support
I am hopeful that all forms are sent in on time*
In this paradigm
So your group can stay in compliance
*Reports are due on Jan. 15
Thank you in advance for your timely report!
March 2021
Tune: Theme to Cheers
Coding your way on the web today
Takes skill and endless thought.
Taking breaks to uncross one’s eyes
Sure does help a lot!
Those “ohs and ones” all night and day…
All those nights when you stare at screen lights
And it’s time to check email
Your cursor taps the O.K. button
And you hope the code don’t fail
Then you’re in the wrong window…
Sometimes you need to go
Relax a bit with some home brew…
Then back to work and follow through.
You have a ‘Net to oversee
And report findings for Q2
You want to get through all the items in your queue.
—-
To all the spiders in the Kingdom
Thank you for your time
The past five years have gone by so fast
It’s been so sublime!
Two last requests before I go– (Please)
Submit reports and to Dyryke say, “Hello!”
Reports are due Income Tax Day…
Take 5 mins to send today!!
Then relax a bit with some home brew…
Get through all the items in your queue…
January 2021
October 2020
Tune: Itsy, Bitsy Spider 😀
The Kingdom’s busy Spiders spin webs around the clock
They code and test and post the things with digital chalk
Three months have passed and we’re now in Quarter 4, so
Please submit reports for the sites you stand up for
July 2020
With apologies to the Bee Gees
Well, you can tell by the way they use ‘net
They spin the silk to create a web
Keeping info true and up-to-date
So people know to not be late
And it’s their time, it’s the way
Our Spiders need to seize the day!
Submit the form, as it’s key,
To send reports in for Q3!
As the world’s a-cyber while codin’ like a spider
They’re spinnin’ the webs, spinnin’ the webs,
Keep the sites from breakin’ with major undertakin’,
They’re spinnin’ the webs, spinnin’ the webs.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, spinnin’ the webs, spinnin’ the webs,
Ah, ha, ha, ha, spinnin’ the webs
“No down time” is the battle cry
From day to day, July to July.
Creatin’ sites through digital sparks
That represent all in AEthelmearc!
And it’s their time, it’s the way
Our Spiders need to seize the day!
Submit the form, as it’s key,
To send reports in for Q3!
As the world’s a-cyber while codin’ like a spider
They’re spinnin’ the webs, spinnin’ the webs,
Keep the sites from breakin’ with major undertakin’,
They’re spinnin’ the webs, spinnin’ the webs.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, spinnin’ the webs, spinnin’ the webs,
Ah, ha, ha, ha, spinnin’ the webs
April 2020
Tune: Phantom of the Opera
Out in the Æthel-verse
Spiders are there
They spin designs for you
from secret lairs
And once the projects’ done
The webs combine
The Kingdom’s information comes to you
While logged-in online!
Sometimes they dream in code,
Sometimes they snore…
But eternal nightmares end
in 404s.
But none of these exist, for they truly shine!
Please thank your local Spider for their work,
As it’s devine!
—
As all of you have guessed,
Web reporting’s due.
Could our Spiders please put forth**
Items for Q-2?
In only 10 short days* is the deadline.
Spiders of the Realm please heed this call
And, please, submit on time. 🙂
* http://ae.scaforms.org/view.php?id=11597
** Deadline is April 15
January 2020 (written right before the new year)
Tune: Bankrobber
With apologies to Chumbawamba
(If you didn’t know, they sing *excellent* a Capella)
Charlotte is a web-spider
And she’s reminding all of info
It’s important to check your “ohs” and ones
So you can make the world glow
On the site she checked all things
To ensure its accuracy
Then she filled out her report
Verifying the site’s actuality
Charlotte is a web-spider
And she’s reminding all of info
It’s important to check your “ohs” and ones
So you can make the world glow
As the year comes to the end
She notes a major change is needed
Copyrights will go out of date
And “2020” needs to be seated
Charlotte is a web-spider
And she’s reminding all of info
It’s important to check your “ohs” and ones
So you can make the world glow
January is next on tap
To send in web-report submissions
She quickly notes that the 15th’s
The deadline for their transmissions
Charlotte is a web-spider
And she loves to post good info
She just loves those “ohs” and ones
Through which she makes the world glow
September 2019
Tune: The Addams Family
They’re seeking and they’re geeking
Mysteriously sneaking 🙂
Sometimes they’re just tweaking
The Spiders of the Realm
Their sites can be museums
For people go to see ’em
The info’s “carpe diem”
From the Spiders of the Realm
It’s time to send reports in
For all sites that your supporting
On time* you should be sporting
Thank you, Spiders of the Realm!
—
* Q4 Reports are due October 15
http://webminister.aethelmearc.org/online-webminister-report-form
Song: Monkees Theme Song
It’s now time….
To send in your news
Please submit the report form
Then go drink some booze 🙂
Hey, hey, all you Spiders!
Queue up the timpani
And type out what you’ve been doin’
In the days makin’ up Q3.
We link to wherever we’re asked to
Code sites and then review
We look through minute details
As often there’s something new
Include those facts and figures
Due 15 July – by the way
Submit that information
Before your deadline slips away…
(Tune: It’s Peanut Butter Jelly Time)
It’s Quarter 2 Reporting Time!
Quarter 2 Reporting Time!
Quarter 2 Reporting Time!
Spider-folk
Spider-folk
Spider-folk
Spider-folk
Fill it out
Fill it out
Fill it out
Fill it out
Do the Q2 Reporting, the Q2 Reporting, the Q2 Reporting with a submit click
Do the Q2 Reporting, the Q2 Reporting, the Q2 Reporting with a submit click
Now, type those deets out please
By April Fifteen please
Now, type those deets out please
By April Fifteen please
No 404 (uh huh)
No 403 (Let’s go)
No 502 (You got it)
No 500 (Let’s surf)
Now sheet-style, script style, VB style, Java style, your style
Now XML style, HTML style, PHP style, C style, your style
Spider-folk
Spider-folk
Spider-folk
Spider-folk
Fill it out
Fill it out
Fill it out
Fill it out
Tune: Auld Lang Syne
January’s here my friends
Which means Q1 reports are due
Remember recent change o’policy
So things seem a bit askew
Fill out the form by the 15th, web folk
Put this task right in your queue
Please submit your info on time, web folk
… and now I’ll bid adieu.
October 2018:
(With apologies to Danny Elfman)
Tune: This Is Halloween
Web folk friends of every age
It is time to report through a posted exchange
Go on site and you will see
The place to submit web-words to me
Today is Halloween, tonight is Halloween
Spiders convene under vast starlight
This is Halloween, please do not make a scene
Trick or treat then please fill the short form out tonight
It’s our web, please be seen
On the ‘net this Halloween
You are the one who fills out a report
And then I report to the Society sort
I cannot do this without your deets…
So please take 5 minutes and submit your sheet!
This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!
It’s our web, Spiders be seen
On the ‘net this Halloween!
August 2018:
(With apologies to Simon & Garfunkel)
Hello, August, our old friend,
It’s Quarter 3 Reporting time again!
Fill out the webform and hit “submit”
Then all your information it transmits
Webministers, please complete this simple task.
That’s all I ask.
Type ‘em out…
by the 15th…
of August…
May 2018:
(With apologies to Peter, Paul, & Mary)
Puck, the friendly spider
Lives on fine spun silk
He often codes while on his web
And creates some nifty filk!
He noted time was passing
As reports were nearly due
He did not want to submit late
His info for Q2.
So,
He went to the report form
Entered keystrokes fairly quick
Attached a pic of of his blue card
Then sent it with a “click”!
The moral of this story
For webmins’ters everywhere
Report on time — by May 15th
Fill out the questionnaire 😀
February 2018:
Tune: WKRP in Cincinnati
—————
Spiders, it’s day 6 of February,
Just 9 days left to send in web reports,
Please take some time to fill out information,
And let me know if you need addition’l support.
It’s been three months since your last submissions,
Compliance checks are happening right now,
I’m viewin’ sites for the Blackfox Webbies,
And takin’ time to read things and just browse.
Keep on spinnin’ webs, dearest AEthelmearc.
November 2017:
With apologies, once again, to The Beatles
Tune: Yesterday
Don’t delay.
November 15th quickly comes your way!
Webmin’ster reports are due that day.
So send yours in ‘fore time slips away.
(I guarantee –
Once sent in there’ll be serenity…
… for three months and then we’ll see
the next report comes due to me.)
But for now go here (http://ae.scaforms.org/view.php?id=11597)
And translate some “ohs” and ones.
Next click on submit
And then, yes, it will be done!
Again, I say,
Spin that web and note it right away
I’d appreciate that communique
So your group is squared away!
The deadline’s just a week away……
—–
Reminder: Kingdom Webminister Policies state that if a group does not report two quarters in a row, the link to the local group site will be removed from the Kingdom Website.
New Webminister Policies:
1. If a Webminister has a combined position with the Chronicler in a local group that the Webminister is expected to submit a Webminister report as these are two separate positions at Kingdom level.
2. Failure to report on-time for two consecutive quarters will be deemed as a voluntary resignation and a revocation of the webminister’s warrant.
Thank you for your report!
– Amalie
Æ Kingdom Webminister
August 2017:
(Tune: Leavin’ on a Jet Plane)
The car’s unpacked
I’m home at last
Pennsic is done– I had a blast*!
I hated wakin’ up and say goodbyes…
But Q3 has ended
It’s time to click**
The form’s a-waitin’
It goes real quick
Web-folk heed the call–
Please do try!!
Webministers, it’s time to report!
Tell me if you need some tech support.
Let the ones and zeros come my way!
In 2 days submissions come due
As of now, I only have a few
(Oh, please, submit on time!***)
* Full disclosure: I was not at Pennsic 
, but it fit the filk and satisfied the earworm 
…
** Report form URL: http://ae.scaforms.org/view.php?id=11597
*** Kingdom Webminister Policies state that if a group does not report two quarters in a row, the link to the local group site will be removed from the Kingdom Website.
With apologies to Peter, Paul, and Mary and in service to Æthelmearc,
Lady Amalie
Æ Webminister
May 2017:
(With apologies to The Beatles)
Tune: Eight Days a Week
Ooh I need your report now,
Guess you know it’s true.
Hope you send the infoz,
For the period of Q2.
Txt it, email it, link it, submit it.
Ain’t got excuses — please send it,
Eight days ’til due!
Short code:
Due – May 15
Report Link – http://ae.scaforms.org/view.php?id=11597
In service,
Amalie
AE Webminster
November 2016:
Tap, tap, tap on little keys,
Fill out your Webminister report,
Oh, yes please!
Spend a few minutes, find a way,
Quarter 4 is due today!
The groups below are all okay,
Info was received through survey.
(Tune: Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star)